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Age is Just a Number If It's a Survey


A study in 2013, surveyed 2000 seniors with 45 questions about how well they were functioning. I took the test, just now, and scored 19. A score of 1-20 indicates that: "You're young at heart but secretly love crosswords, and use anti-ageing products just in case." This is incorrect. I am not at all secretive about my love for crosswords.


If I had taken the test yesterday, which for various reasons was a very trying, 3-glasses-of-wine-that-evening sort of day, I would have scored "you are dead or close to it".

('m kidding...don't want to put you off of taking the test. But, you get my drift.)


I have copied the test so that you can try it if you are interested. Add up how many times you answer yes and look at the scoring system at the end. If you like, you can let me know how you did in the comments section.


How many of these 45 signs of getting old apply to you?

  1. Feeling stiff.

  2. Groaning when you bend down.

  3. Saying, “It wasn’t like that when I was young.”

  4. Losing hair. (only the hair you don't want to lose).

  5. You don’t know any songs in the top ten.

  6. Getting hairier – ears, eyebrows, nose, face etc. (everywhere else, see No. 4).

  7. You're playing Candy Crush Saga more than you used to.

  8. Talking a lot about joints/ailments. (cannabis is now legal in Canada and some U.S. states. You may take the word "joints" any way that is applicable)

  9. Forgetting people’s names.

  10. Choosing clothes and shoes for comfort rather than style.

  11. Thinking police/teachers/doctors are too young to be doing that job.

  12. Falling asleep in front of the TV.

  13. Needing an afternoon nap.

  14. Finding you have no idea what young people are talking about.

  15. Struggling to use a computer.

  16. Losing touch with everyday technology such as tablets and televisions.

  17. Complaining about everything.

  18. Wearing your glasses around your neck. (It becomes a necessity. See No. 21)

  19. Not knowing the name of any modern bands.

  20. Avoiding lifting heavy things due to back concerns.

  21. Searching everywhere for your glasses which just happen to be on your head.

  22. You move from Rock and Roll radio stations to Talk Radio.

  23. Preferring a night in watching Netflix than a night on the town.

  24. Taking a keen interest in The Antiques Road Show.

  25. You talk to people, so young, they don’t know what "dial a number" means.

  26. Taking slippers to friends’ houses.

  27. Listening to the late night Talk radio shows because you can't get back to sleep (see No. 22).

  28. Falling asleep after one glass of wine.

  29. Never going out without your coat.

  30. Getting bed socks for Christmas and thinking "What a lovely gift."

  31. You can’t lose six pounds in two days any more. (if at all.)

  32. Dying for a cup of tea or coffee (not to be taken literally)

  33. Joining a woman's club of some kind.

  34. Taking a keen interest in the garden. (or anything else you have become obsessed with that you would haven't given a flying you-know-what about at one time)

  35. Spending more money on face creams/anti-ageing products (I might need to get a part-time job)

  36. Spending money on the home/furniture rather than a night on the town.

  37. Taking a keen interest in dressing for the weather.

  38. Putting everyday items in the wrong place.

  39. Obsessive bird feeding.

  40. Really enjoying puzzles and crosswords.

  41. Always driving at the speed limit.

  42. Consider going on a ‘no children’ allowed cruise for a holiday.

  43. Your ears are getting bigger (and your nose, too, by the way, I just found this out and I'm kind of mad about that one).

  44. Drinking wine (or like I do, more wine than ever before).

  45. Feeling you have the right to tell people exactly what you are thinking even if it isn’t polite (My childhood nickname was lastwordlinda. I don't know why).

Results


1 - 20 - You're young at heart but secretly love crosswords and use anti-ageing products just in case.

20 - 35 - You've started eating at the same restaurants because you can digest their food easily, and you can't stand pop music. Limit your wine to keep feeling young. (I'm going to skip this phase altogether).

35 - 45 - If you have most of the ageing signs it's time to accept the inevitable. Turn the heat up a high as you like. No one would dare stop you now, anyway.


Have a good one!



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